Dealing with Crohn's

After the fourth time
I am the living dead
shuffling between
the bathroom
and my bed

With each trip
I get a little slower
With each trip
My ass gets
a little sorer

Now if I'm lucky
and I can feel
one of my turns
coming on
then I can load up
on enough pills
to dull away
a bit of the edge

But if I'm not
and I get lost
within a purge
then it's off to
terrorville
where my guts will
attempt to blow up
while still inside of me

Then it takes
everything I am
to drag myself
out of my bed
and spill my guts
only to shuffle
back into bed
carefully collapsing
without sending
ripples of pain
through my body

When it gets past ten
I've reached my breaking point
I begin to beg and plead
for any relief possible
sometimes my tears are
answered by the
blessed arrival of
full blown diarrhea
which hints to me
that the cramps have
almost run their course

If the diarrhea doesn't come
then the only thing
that can save me
is when the pain and exertion
leave me too weak to
remain conscious